Honest Ads

If Jewelry Commercials Were Honest

If Viagra Commercials Were Honest

If Fast Food Commercials Were Honest (McDonald's, Burger King, Wendy's, Taco Bell)

Turns out the only thing grosser than the food at McDonald's, Taco Bell, Wendy's and Burger King is how the commercials

If Sports Drink Commercials Were Honest

You might as well just eat dyed sugar. It's probably healthier.

If Car Commercials Were Honest (BMW Ford Toyota Chevrolet Parody)

Although there's still not enough gold jewelry.

Why Marriage is a Scam

Can you really put a price on love? The answer is, yes, of course you can.

If People Who Sell Stuff Were Honest About Black Friday

Black Friday: The day invented by people who sell things to lure the people who buy things away from their families on o

The Bizarre Unspoken Truth About Pet Ownership

Thanks to centuries of forced inbreeding and genetic tampering, you too can own docile versions of once dangerous animal

Why Presidential Debates Can't Be Honest

It's the magical time of year when debates coming rolling in way before they're really necessary, and are loaded with a

If Gyms Were Honest

Gyms: They're the only way you can get fit, aside from all the other ways, and the only place you can get juice, aside f

If Soda Commercials Were Honest (Coca-cola, Pepsi, Dr. Pepper Parody)

If it's hot out and you're in dire need of refreshment, just grab yourself an ice cold bottle of candy.

If Make-Up Ads Were Honest

It's all about making money by destroying society's already low self-esteem.

If Video Game Commercials Were Honest (Playstation X-Box Gamer Video Games Parody)

Because if anyone needs real talk, it's gamers.

When Mobile Providers Are Actually Honest (Verizon, AT&T, Sprint, T-mobile parody)

Enough with the maps! We don't even understand their meanings anyway.

If Coffee Commercials Were Honest (Starbucks, Coffee Bean, Folgers Parody)

Only good marketing could get the entire world addicted to black liquid that raises blood pressure and increases stress.

If Birth Control Commercials Were Honest

When are guys going to have to start enduring the rigors of birth control?

If Drug Companies Were Honest

Let's just go back to blood-letting and bile drinking already.

If Antidepressant Commercials Were Honest

They SHOULD tell you, but don't because it's hard to market nightmares.

If The Meat Industry Was Honest

If you like hamburgers, maybe don't watch this video.

If Energy Drink Ads Were Honest (Monster, Red Bull, Gatorade Parody)

Energy drinks are just like drugs except with cooler colors.

If Airlines Were Honest (United, Delta, Southwest, American Airlines Parody)

Airlines: Bending you over for the pleasure of soaring 39,000 feet above the earth in a fart-filled tube.

If The Lottery Was Honest

The lottery is a great investment of your hard earned money, but only if you win.

If Hotel Ads Were Honest

Maybe don't watch this while sitting in your hotel room.

If Every Famous Diet Idea Was Honest

Before you try to fast-track that weight loss resolution.

If Toothpaste Ads Were Honest

Brushing your teeth is overrated anyway.

If Purse Ads Were Honest

All purses inevitably end up being overpriced, tiny trashcans.

If Children's Cereal Commercials Were Honest

Look, Cocoa Puffs are totally the bomb, but maybe eating the entire box in one day isn't such a great thing.

If Grocery Store Commercials Were Honest

Grocery stores are better at screwing with your head than they are keeping their shelves stocked.

If High School and College Textbooks Were Honest

They say history is written by the victors, but it's actually written by publishers and politicians who all have agendas

Why Credit Cards Are A Scam

If you've ever wanted to know what it's like to sell your soul and never get it back, just open up a credit card.

If Superstore Ads Were Honest (Target, Walmart Parody)

Sure, you can buy two 20-gallon drums of mayonnaise for the price of one at your local Superstore, like the crazy person

If Smart Watch Commercials Were Honest

Thanks to Apple and Fitbit Smart Watches are a great way to keep us honest and track data you couldn't before - because

If Theme Parks Were Honest (Disneyland, Six Flags Parody)

Theme parks, especially Disneyland, Disney World, and Six Flags are great if you enjoy being mentally (and financially)

If Mobile Games Were Honest (Android, iOS Parody)

Want the best android and ios mobile games? Great! Just so we're all clear here when it comes to mobile games, 'freemium

If Milk Commercials Were Honest

Milk, dairy, cheese and lactose commercials are great and all but no one's ever actually looked into how much our consum

If Junk Food Commercials Were Honest

Now that we're starting to get this whole cigarette thing under control, can we take care of the junk food companies tha

If Music Festivals Were Honest (Bonnaroo, Coachella, Lollapalooza Parody)

Bonnaroo, Coachella, Lollapalooza, Summerfest and other famous music festivals look cool on your friend's Instagram feed

If Student Loans Were Honest (College Debt)

College is going to be one of the biggest investments of your life, which is why you should just trust what the student

If Professional Football Were Honest (NFL, Cheerleaders, Concussions)

Who else is excited for another season of the world's most popular public slaughter house fueled by human lives? Oh ...

If Cell Phone Commercials Were Honest (iPhone, Android)

Now that our lives are pretty much inseparable from our smart devices, it would only be the honest and responsible thing

If Juice Cleanse Ads Were Honest (Detox, Master Cleanse)

Feeling bloated and need to detox? Well, drinking salad in liquid form will absolutely not help you at all, but boy will

If Tampon Ads Were Honest (Also Maxi Pads & Other "Feminine Products")

If Recycling Were Honest

Roger Horton returns for the first time since 2017 to explain why recycling is pointless and, even worse – basically j

If Megachurches Were Honest

There's nothing quite like claiming your tax-free, multi-million dollar enterprise is inspired by an intentionally homel

If Dentists Were Honest

If dentists were honest, nobody would ever go to the dentist. And, honestly, we'd probably be fine.

If Cryptocurrency Was Honest

Everybody is familiar with money, but thanks to cryptocurrencies like Bitcoin, Dogecoin, Ethereum, Stellar, and Binance

If Hard Seltzer Ads Were Honest

White Claw Summer is out, and Horton's Hard Poison Fizzy Summer is IN.

If Dating Apps Were Honest

What would happen if dating apps like Tinder, Match.com, Bumble and others were actually honest? They'd sound kinda like

If Crowdfunding Sites Were Honest

What would happen if crowdfunding sites like Kickstarter, GoFundMe, Indiegogo and others were actually honest? They prob

If Smart TV Ads Were Honest

If we were Honest about smart televisions, we probably wouldn't actually want featherweight FBI surveillance vans spying

If Tax Prep Sites Were Honest

If tax prep sites were honest about why taxes suck so much, we'd probably burn the whole thing down.

If NFTs Were Honest

What if NFT collections like Bored Ape Yacht Club, Azuki, CloneX, and other such stupid crap were actually honest about

If Internet Service Providers Were Honest

What if Internet Service Providers like Centurylink, Comcast, and Cox were actually honest about how horrifically terrib

If Toilet Paper Ads Were Honest

What if toilet paper brands like Charmin, Cottonelle, Caboo were actually honest about that stuff we rub on our butt to

If Wine Ads Were Honest

What if Wine Companies (vineyards?) were actually honest about how horrifically terrible they are? Roger Horton investig

If Insurance Companies Were Honest | Cracked Throwback

Insurance people are really just the superheroes of bending us over for the pleasure of paying them to do the bare minim

If Chocolate Ads Were Honest

What if chocolate companies like Hershey's, Nestle, Mars, and others were actually honest about how horrifically terribl

If Gaming Gear Were Honest

What if Gaming Gear companies like SecretLab, Razer, Logitech, Alienware and others were actually honest about what they

If Social Media Were Honest (Facebook, Instagram, Tik Tok)

What if social media platforms like Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and TikTok were actually honest about how destructive

Why You'll Never Buy A House

What if Real Estate Companies and Realtors were actually honest about how horrifically terrible they are? Roger Horton i

If Streaming Services Were Honest

What if streaming services like HBOMax, Netflix, Hulu, Disney+, and others were actually honest about how horrifically t

If Mattress Commercials Were Honest

What if mattress companies like Purple, Casper, Nectar, and all the others were actually honest about how destructive an

If Virtual Reality Was Honest

What if Virtual Reality companies like Meta and Oculus were actually honest about how horrifically terrible they are? Ro

If Jobs Were Honest

What if jobs and employers were honest about the kind of work you'll be doing? Roger Horton investigates.

If Healthcare Was Honest

What if hospitals and health insurance companies like UnitedHealth Group, Anthem, Aetna, Cigna, Humana, and others were

If Comic Book Movies Were Honest

What if Marvel and DC and everybody else were honest about how they make their dumb comic book movies? Roger Horton inve

If Podcasts Were Honest

What if podcasters were honest about the content they were making?

If Cruises Were Honest

What if cruises were honest about your floating vacation?

Welcome to Honest Ads promo

All Roger, all in one place.

If Bars Were Honest

What if were your neighborhood bar was honest?

If Dispensaries Were Honest

What if were your neighborhood dispensary was honest?

If Movie Theatres Were Honest

What if were your local movie theatre was honest?

If Perfume Commercials Were Honest (Perfume Ad Parody)

What if fragrance ads were honest?

If Casinos Were Honest

What if casinos commercials were honest? Well, here at Horton’s Palace, we are.

If Landlords Were Honest

Roger is your landlord now, and he's getting real honest about things.

If Divorce Lawyers Were Honest (Divorce Lawyer Commercial Parody)

Looking for divorce lawyers? Hire Roger Horton For All Your Divorce Needs. Call 1-800-Actual-Lawyer Today.

If Live Streamers Were Honest (Twitch Stream Parody)

Live Streamers Rise up! What's up Rogheads, the stream's about to start.

If Plastic Surgeons Were Honest

How do you know if you can trust your plastic surgeon? At Dr. Roger's Dysmorphia Exacerbation Clinic, We've been Making

If Vitamin Shops Were Honest

Will Vitamin Shops Really get you swole? Your Swole At Horton's Holistic Vita-World

If Bachelor Parties Were Honest

It's Bachelor Party Season! Horton's Concerningly Horny Stag Party Planning has you covered for all your bachelor and ba

If The Cemetery Industry Was Honest

The Cemetery Industry Makes Dying Even Spookier than it already is. So THIS is what happens to your body after you die

If Nonprofits Were Honest

What if nonprofits were honest about what they're up to?

If Skincare Was Honest

Skincare, It's all about making money by destroying society's already low self-esteem.

If Organic Food Was Honest

If organic food farms were honest, here's what they'd tell you about "eating clean"

If Frats and Sororities Were Honest (College Greek Life Parody)

College is going to be one of the biggest investments of your life, so why not spend a little extra buying a bunch of fr

If Job Searching Were Honest (LinkedIn, ZipRecruiter, Indeed Parody)

What if the job market was honest about the job search process?

If Rideshare Apps Were Honest (Uber, Lyft Parody)

If Rideshare Apps Were Honest, here's what they'd say.

If Amazon Were Honest (Amazon Parody)

If Online Shopping Were Honest, here's what they'd say.

If Government Tourism Ads Were Honest (Local Tourism Board Parody)

If Local Tourism Ads were honest, here's what they'd say.

Leonardo DaVinci Had No Idea How Men's Junk Worked

As it turns out, Leonardo DaVinci didn't know anything about men's anatomy, despite depicting it in art like, a lot.

If Electric Cars Were Honest (Tesla EV Parody)

If electric car commercials were honest, here's how they'd sound.

If Holiday Movies Were Honest

What if Hollywood were honest about how they make their dumb holiday Rom-com movies? Roger Horton investigates.

The 12 Days Of Rogemas | Happy Holidays from Honest Ads

Happy Holidays from Honest Ads!

If Thirst Tweets Were Honest (Twitter, Buzzfeed)

Honest Ads is on hiatus, but please enjoy this bonus content of Roger Reading some extremely honest thirst tweets about

If 2023 Were Honest

Happy New Year from Roger and the Cracked team! See you in 2024.

If AirBnB Was Honest

What if homeshare tech companies like AirBnB were actually honest about how terrible they are?

If The News Were Honest

If your local news was honest, here's what they'd say, according to Roger Horton

If Roger Horton Auditioned for Shark Tank (Vote for your favorite new product!)

Never-before-seen footage of Roger Horton auditioning to be on Shark Tank by pitching new Horton product lines. Vote on

If The Superbowl Were Honest (Superbowl Commercials, NFL Sponsors, chiefs)

Who else is excited for the next annual Big Game, featuring the world's most popular public slaughter house fueled by hu

If Online Therapy Was Honest [Better Help Parody]

What if mental health apps were honest about how bogus they are?